In Relaxed Haze, In Dateless Fear
I wish I had something witty or clever to say here, but I stink at writing these things. It's just a garden-variety tumblr so there'll probably be all kinds of things on it and I can't promise that it will always be interesting.

Depending on what day you view this blog you could see very different subject matter. There isn't really a theme or a style to it. It's just a personal blog so sometimes I post about my life and how I'm feeling.

I am a 19 year old Canadian girl from ontario

Hi I'm Alexii
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Today Was a Quiet Day.

I Was Compared to a Nazi Today.

So, I’m Going to New York on Thursday

Yup. It’s gonna be freaking sweet. Gonna live it up in the big apple with all my friends and stuff.

I’ll be gone until Sunday.

But fret not because I’ve made a pretty boss queue so there’ll still be regular posts from me clogging up your dash.

It’ll be almost like I never left.

So I’m not sure why I’m telling you because you probably wouldn’t have noticed if I hadn’t.


This has been a post.

Anybody know what the Weather’s Gonna be Like in New York this Week?

I’m trying to decide what to pack but all the reports I’ve seen are really inconsistent.

Some say it’s going to be super warm and nice, some said a storm on Thursday and then Sunday from there on out, and some say it’s going to rain from Thursday til Sunday!!!

So uh, I don’t really know what to do.

Anyone out there have an idea?

I’m Back From New York!

It was…interesting.

Really fun and really packed with stuff, but also super tiring and a little restricting.

Yeah, it was cool.

I don’t think I’ll bore you with the details because I’m not sure everyone would want to read about that but it was great.

Adventures were had.


There is no one that I know in real life that I hate.

Seriously, I don’t think I can think of a single person.

There are certainly people with whom I do not get along, but I think that’s ok!

Read More

Aaaah, People.

Ah, this really timid asian woman just came to my door. She was young and her name was Daisy and she was so sweet and barely spoke any english.

I usually wouldn’t answer, but my door is glass so she could kind of see me. It would have been weird if I just sat there.

She was trying to sell something but I had a really hard time understanding her. Maybe textbooks?!

Yes, I think it was university prep/extra help books something like that.

I said I wasn’t really interested because I didn’t want to waste her time, but then she asked where all the other kids on the street live.

I don’t know any of my nieghbors very well and I told her, but she kept asking and made me guess at every house on the street.

She looked so down and said everyone was saying no to her! She was trying so hard to be professional but she didn’t really know what to say and she had this organized little colour coded list and she was making notes of everyone’s answers. She was so sweet and she said I looked very mature and she wished she could be confident like me.

And then she shook my hand and asked what my name was and gah, I felt so bad not buying her books; she was such a kind little lady but I just don’t need one.

I only spoke with her for like five minutes but I really want good things for her.

I hope she feels better about herself and no one is rude to her and people buy her books and she has a nice day.

Wow I’m so Fricking MAD!!!

I went to go through Sufjan Steven’s stuff on ITunes but one of the albums is missing.


My favourite one.

I was like: oh it must have only been released in the USA or something, I’ll go check.

Lo and behold, there it was.

But I. Can’t. Buy. It.

My ITunes account can only make purchases in Canada apparently, and even though I can view it, I can preview it, I cannot buy it.

I’m sure there’s some big ol’ reason for why I can’t but I don’t know it and it’s so frustrating to me that 1. it’s not available in Canada, and 2. that even though it is all electronic I can’t buy it?!

It’s not like there’s shipping.

It’s not like they would have to make me my own physical copy.

The reason I like and use ITunes is because of the size of their selection, and the fact that if it’s not carried in a store, I can still get it online.

So then what is the point of an online store that allows music to be purchased even when it cannot be found in a physical store making certain things only available in specific places!?

Fricking fricking faaaaaaaaaaaaaah GOD.

Screw you and your stupid rules.

About a week ago I submitted my resume to a clothing store.

I manged to mispronounce the word “hiring” three times and I can’t remember if I looked her in the eyes at all.

I wasn’t expecting her to ask me anything, so it took me by surprise when she wanted to know why I wanted to work there and I mumbled something about liking people and stuff and rushed out.

I made a really bad first impression so I was definitely sure I wasn’t even going to be considered for that job.

But she called me this morning and wants to set up an interview.


Ah, what a good day

don’t really know how to format this so I’m just gonna rhyme off what went great in blocks:

I got to school on time which seldom happens

Got to wear a cute outfit instead of the Pep crew shirt I had to wear on the first day

Math is pretty easy! I did homework last night that he was gave us time in class to do today so I was ahead. The amount of additional work is about as much as I would have received nightly last year, but it’s due Friday!

woot. time.

My teacher wanted us to get to know him better so he showed us all photos from his travels and he has an accent and I’m not sure English is his first language, and I loved listening to him speak, he’s so cute and eager and young and a really cool guy.

I got to be in a group with my friends in chemistry and we made chemistry puns and I don’t have much homework for the class!

The Pep crew leader made banana chocolate chip muffins/cupcakes and they were amazing and I actually had a lunch where I wasn’t running around doing something and it was so nice.

In English we were pretending to be people in a hurricane and we had to decide( half of us as people in a board room and half of us as the trapped people) which seven of the fifteen should be spared.

God I love discussing moral stuff like that; it’s so grey. We watched a lecture on it and the teacher said a lot of the class is going to be asking these kinds of questions.

I have a spare last so I got to go home early

While I was waiting for the bus and there was a really cute guy talking to a woman and he spoke a little too fast and a little too quiet and his voice was kind and expressive.

I kept looking at him and he kept looking at me but I don’t think either of us knew what to say

It’s sunny and windy, and I got a seat in the back by the window with a lovely view while the bus took its new route. It was great because I knew it ended at the same place, but I had no idea how it was going to get there so I had all new scenery to watch.

The guy sitting in front of me had a cigarette behind his right ear (I did not know people actually did that) and pretty big spacers and he accidentally knocked one out and spent five minutes trying to get it back in.

The cute guy was chatting happily to everyone around him and I love people like that; those who can flow in a conversation so easily (because it’s something I have trouble with) and he spoke so beautifully.

You ever meet people that are just intrinsically fascinating?

Well he was to me. I’m a big people watcher and I love getting to see such open and lovely people.

I walked to the front of the bus a little too early and had very brief and pleasant conversation with the driver about human anatomy.

I love people. I love days where things are just nice.

I just had a really great conversation with my dad about hypocrisy and enabling people and fate and existentialism and it was awesome I love talking to my dad.

He’s a pretty chill dude and makes me think about things in a lot of different ways.


I’m on student council and it’s spirit week this week and today was crazy hat day.

Every member of student council was expected to participate and we advertised and reminded people and stuff. There were probably like, ten kids that did it.

Walking the halls of high school all day in a woolen zebra hat beside my friend in a yellow fisherman’s hat while no one else is wearing a hat of any kind was probably one of the lowest points in my life.


I got 20% higher on a test than I thought I was going to.

I spent 15 minutes playing with the cool rocks that were left out in the geography class and then went on a nature walk.The environmental club was collecting seeds and stuff and I tagged along.

I touched the nature, but the nature touched me too.

I am one with the earth.

My group is writing a script for English and I made a pretty rad incest pun.

I got to go home early.

I don’t even have to try, it’s always a good time.